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[bitter end]

A little old lady was walking down the Paisley Road West in the Sooth
Side o Glesga dragging two large plastic bin bags behind her. One of
the bags rips, and every once in a while a £20 note falls out onto the
pavement.

Noticing this, a polisman stops her, and says, " Oi , there are £20
notes falling out of your bag."

Oh phuq it !" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back, and see
if I can find them. Thanks for telling me."

"Well, now, not so fast," says the polis.

"How did you get all that money? "

"
Well my back garden is right next to the Ibrox stadium car park. On
game days, a lot of fans come and pish through the fence into my flower
garden.. So, I stand behind the fence wi a big pair o hedgin shears.
Each time some guy sticks his willie through the fence, I take a wee
grip an I say,

" 20 quid or aff it comes'.

"Well, that seems only fair" laughs the polis. " Good luck! Oh, by the
way, what's in the other bag?"

"Well, you know",      -------    " some o them daft ba---rds dinna pay ! ."