Coos new amphibious twin rigger

Dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear Pikey you really are a STUPID boy anyone wi a brain would be in hiding wi shame the now.

Davie, that's the funniest thing I've read in years. Tears streamin' doon ma cheeks.  

attention pecton maximus,your e mail box is full.delete some,you have mail.

my joke got deleted again well bob ya thick shegite skipper u cant say 2 much u put a angle grinder into ur arm there ment 4 steel or grinding not 4 removing ur arm cause its sore from getting a grip

You should send Billy Smart your cv i would say its the only hope for you.

is tat where u got trained

might just be cos i think deacon blue are sh!te but that dinna make any sense to me?, i've a good idea who wrote the words to that heap of (insert your own opinion here) that wee patrick wrote the tune for on the beeb earlier tonight tho, i know i've been away my holidays but surely theres a certain level that must be maintained when ripping the pish oota rikki, tho saying that, i wasn't even tempted when he gave me a call and told me about it, not even when he came fast in the middle of the conversation and heres me thinking i'm the one with the short attention span?
oh, no reflection on the poetry, i just hate deacon blue, might have something to do with a certain supermarket manager being a big girls blouse about the other rikki and that tube doogie vipond.

oh and finally if your on about music in this context, RIP john martin, voice of an angel,

great to have you back qw?

Rikki taking the rules of the road to far  

very good   4u happens 2 the best o us